Hand in Hand

 Hand in Hand

Ai-san, the truth is, I’ve actually never been rejected.

In that one respect, I suppose I have the edge over Nietzsche.

Nietzsche did something completely incomprehensible—he had his best friend confess his feelings for him. Naturally, Salome couldn’t possibly marry a man like that.

Once she realized that Nietzsche—a man for whom she might have even felt some respect or affection—lacked the courage to confess his own feelings, and instead relied on a proxy to propose, she must have been completely turned off. It’s no wonder she couldn’t marry him.

Salome was the center of attention for many an intellectual man; she certainly never lacked for romantic prospects.

As for the secret to my own "undefeated" record—I imagine you’d like to know it, Ai-san—but first...

Nietzsche seems to have taken his personal-life frustrations out on the New Testament. While some of his criticisms of Christianity certainly hit the mark, I believe it is a mistake to reject the religion entirely.

In many respects, the love and self-sacrifice taught by Christ are more valuable than a world governed by the rigid, Mosaic-style legalism. One wonders, too, what exactly he took issue with in the teachings of Paul. Rather than dismissing Christianity in its entirety, it would be better to acknowledge its positive aspects—after all, Nietzsche himself spoke of *amor fati* (love of fate); love is, indeed, of great importance.

It really isn’t all that difficult.

To begin with, as a man, I might find someone who I think is truly wonderful.

The first step is simply to get close to that person.

You might strike up a conversation or have lunch together—but don’t go making some awkward, overt suggestion like, "Let's eat together." Instead, just naturally take a seat next to them and engage in a perfectly ordinary conversation. That’s all there is to it.

By repeating this process, it eventually becomes the norm for you to be sitting right beside that person.

The key here is to sit next to them, not across from them.

I don’t recall who said it, but it is absolutely crucial to make the other person feel as though you are both facing the same direction, rather than sitting face-to-face.

Sometimes this process takes a few weeks; at other times, it can span months or even a year.

Gradually, the other person begins to wonder, "Why is this person always by my side?"

Usually, a shift occurs in the look in their eyes—they start to wonder if perhaps they have feelings for me, or if their affection might be the real thing.

Just as the woman begins to feel a sense of impatience, she might reach out—perhaps asking for help moving some heavy items in her room, saying, "I can't manage this on my own; would you be free on such-and-such a date to give me a hand?"

My "undefeated" record—or rather, my ability to win without even having to fight—stems from the fact that I don't view romance as a contest. Instead, I simply wait until the other person’s heart is truly given to me.